Never mind

Job Prospect

So, there's a new job prospect. I'm not going to share what it is so I don't jinx it. I would kill to have this job, and I really hope they can see the good in me. Keep your fingers crossed, and hope that someday I tell you about what I'm doing for work these days.

what happened today?

I thought this was all over at this point. I've settled into a routine of working out in the morning, reading most of the day, sitting back in the afternoon and watching a movie or some Attack of the Show, and then going off to bed after a little more reading. Wake up, repeat. I was doing this because I thought, in all honesty, that I had a job prospect that was going to work out. I figured with all the awful shit happening lately this would be that one good thing that is supposed to make it all okay. But it wasn't. The lab job I looked so forward to learning was swept up by some internal applicant. Easy for them because no training is required, and I'm back to the drawing board after giving up several things thinking the job was a done deal. So far, I've missed two substitute teaching training meetings and a civil service exam. Guess I'll have to wait on those and settle for some entry level high school level employment until I get the fuck back into school where I obviously belong. I'm tired of the real world and everyone looking at me like the golden child who wasted his chances and didn't try hard enough. So, I'm back to square one of making money. All those dreams of getting a car and starting a social life have started to drift off, especially with the loss of Martha. Lately, I just want to sit in a room and cry to sad songs. Pretend that those away messages are meant for me. Hope that something good happens for all the good I try to do. Almost makes a person want to start drinking or smoking or something that the other people do to cope.

Soon

Not to be totally deceitful, but I don't officially work for American Airlines yet. By saying officially, I mean they do not have my tax information, and if I were to never show up at their office again they would not be able to track me down. That's a comforting feeling the more I look into this job that seemed to answer all my problems - namely joblessness.
So, why have I not learned my city codes (foreign and domestic) yet? You know how you just get feelings about things sometimes? It's a full time job. Starting pay is upwards of nine something an hour. Insurance? Sure, it's there. Kind of the way Jesus is always supposed to be with us: you may pray and pray, but in the end you're going to have to do a lot of the work. Paid time off? Nope. Why? I would only be a lowly call center worker. What do I need time off for. The longer I work the more time I accrue to use as vacation, but no pay. In the end, it's a shifty job for people that can't do any better.
What am I doing at home still? Trying to do better. A friend of my mom hooked me up with this lady that works in the lab at Rex Hospital, and I've met with her about a position growing cultures in the Microbiology lab, which would be totally schweet. (That's the nerd voice for those of you without imaginative reading skills.) I get to mess with people's blood and pee and stools and that is totally awesome to me for some odd reason. And I can sense what you're thinking. "Ian likes to touch poop?" Yes. Always have. Your poop. I've just kept it on the LD.
Plus, I'd get to wear scrubs to work every day and a lab coat with my name in it. Not on it, because doctors get that. But, it would be emblazoned on the tag of the coat. And I'd get all kinds of latex gloves to wear all day. It's a very tempting job and I hope I can land it. The woman I spoke with said that unless someone applies that has "14 years of experience and wants to go back to plating samples" I would probably get the job. That was inspiring. It's across the street. It pays two to three dollars more an hour, and it has excellent benefits. I'd have to work some weekends, but some is better than working all holidays and weekends.
What happens when I get a job? I'm finally buying a car! So I can come to your house. So I can drive around town in the late hours and ease my mind listening to Gotan Project remixes or similar. Right now, I'm pretty set on a Yaris. Cheap, easy to maintain, and great gas mileage.
Soon I'll have a life outside the house.

somewhat independent

My friend Matt who's been my boy practically since I moved here is going out to get his mom a computer so she can hook up with family through e-mail and such. You know, cruise the interweb and all that you do. He's just going to go out and do this. Buy a computer. I'm excited to have a job. Well, a couple of jobs to be fair. This American Airlines thing, and the substitute teaching, and tutoring eventually. I'm excited to be able to pay for my girlfriend again because, as much as I'm for women's rights and all, we still live in the south and if I can't pay when we go out in a group, people look at me with these wandering eyes. Eyes that wander to my crotch and wonder how I lost my penis. Well, no more. Soon enough, I'll have all that stuff that makes me grown up. All that stuff I've been waiting for for so long! Car, job, girlfriend, friends to do stuff with, vacations, old college friends again!